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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23017639">Unrestrained</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrokenBookAddict/pseuds/BrokenBookAddict'>BrokenBookAddict</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Newsroom (US TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Acceptance, Angst, Co-workers, Developing Relationship, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Forgiveness, Friendship, Hurt, Kissing, Light Angst, Love, Past Infidelity, Past Relationship(s), Romance, Romantic Fluff, Workplace, impulsive behaviour</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 11:41:27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,625</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23017639</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrokenBookAddict/pseuds/BrokenBookAddict</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Maybe listening to the unrestrained part of your mind isn't madness, sometimes it may offer the most logical option.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Will McAvoy/MacKenzie McHale</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>56</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Unrestrained</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Obvious disclaimer- I do not own The Newsroom ect...</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They both easily get lost in the moment, falling in deeper as Willie Nelson's voice continues to float throughout the bar. The lyrics hang suspended in the air between them, so much meaning piled on to five simple words. </p><p>
  <em>You're always on my mind... </em>
</p><p>While they may be simple, the weight they hold is anything but. The words perfectly convey exactly what they both feel, even if it remains unspoken, more so on his part. The lyrics say it all anyway. </p><p>The moment lingers on and on and on until finally Mac realises just how far she's fallen under it's spell and without being too obvious pulls back as casually as she can manage from where she had been leaning against the bar. She brushes her hair away from her face, almost relieved when Danielle, the barmaid, returns. Mac watches her look from Will's empty glass to his now wet shirt in obvious amusement. </p><p>"Can I get you another?" She asks, her lips curling into a smirk as she looks at the news anchor. </p><p>Will frowns but before he can even formulate a response, Mackenzie beats him to it. </p><p>"Same again for him and a Jameson rocks for me, please." </p><p>Silence remains between them as they watch Danielle quickly fill their drinks order, Willie Nelson's voice still fills the air. There's no escaping the song, they just need to wait it out because eventually it'll end. </p><p>When her drink is placed before her, she takes it in hand then turns to Will. Her fingers brush the leather folder resting before them. "May I read through the copy?" </p><p>He makes a sweeping motion as if to say, be my guest. </p><p>"Thanks," she says softly. She's about to walk away when she pauses, looking at his wet shirt. "Sorry about the shirt." </p><p>Will rolls his eyes. "Next time, use your words." </p><p>Tilting her head Mackenzie concedes his point. </p><p>Copy and Jameson in hand, she wanders away from the bar leaving him alone with his drink. She finds a secluded corner void of other patrons and away from her staff but it still gives her a view of the bar as she sits down. Taking a sip of her drink, she opens the leather folder to be greeted by Will's familiar but messy handwriting. She settles in to begin the read through.... except it's five minutes later and she realises she hasn't got past the first sentence. The words all blur into one and they mean absolutely nothing. She isn't drunk, just incredibly distracted. </p><p>Looking up, her gaze returns to the bar and the man she left behind. He has his back to her as he sits quietly watching the remainder of Elliott's show. Things between them have been different lately ever since he got out of the hospital, there's been some kind of turning point in the relationship, whatever this relationship is that exists between them. She isn't sure how you would define it but the point is, something's changed. They argue far less then they did, he's toned down his attempts to hurt her and she hasn't done much of anything to rile him up, intentionally or not. Well, unless you count pestering him every single day for months about the message he left her the night of the Bin Laden broadcast, a message she never actually recieved. It irritates her beyond belief that he refuses to tell her, using the flimsy excuse of not remembering but she knows he knows. She'll find a way to eventually get it out of him, ten dope spike cookies or not. </p><p>Still, something's changed and that moment at the bar proves it. There was a heavy weight of tension in the air between them, so thick you could almost feel it with your fingertips. She has to wonder what was going through his mind at that point, was he thinking over everything that has happened? or for once, did he allow himself to just feel this thing that still lives between them? Of course she doesn't know the answer and not for the first time does she wish she could hear what he's thinking because God, wouldn't that make things a lot fucking simpler. </p><p>At times, in the less restrained side of her mind she has the ridiculous thought to just kiss him to see how he would react but knowing her luck, which where they're concerned is all bad, it would backfire in spectacular bloody fashion. The last thing she wants to do is destroy any progress they've made by being impulsive. So she reins in her more impulsive side, at least for now. </p><p>She's broken out of her thoughts when suddenly her unrestricted view to the bar becomes restricted and she looks up to find Will staring down at her. When had he even moved? Was she so lost in thought that she hadn't noticed? </p><p>"May I?" He asks quietly, motioning to the seat besides her. </p><p>Mac nods, closing the folder so she has something to do with her hands but that lasts all of two seconds so she turns her attention to her glass. Slowly her finger traces the rim around and around and around... </p><p>"What did you think?" </p><p>Confused eyes lift from the glass to meet his. "About what?"</p><p>"Tomorrow night's copy." </p><p>"Oh." Mac looks down, her free hand moving to cover the leather. "It's-- good." </p><p>"Good," Will repeats sounding rather doubtful. What he had written was a hell of a lot better than just <em>good</em>.  </p><p>"Yes, it was..." she stumbles over what to say but her mind can't think. </p><p>"Mac, have you even read it?" </p><p>She could lie but then if the copy is full of crap, it will be her fault. "No, I haven't." </p><p>His brows furrow as he stares at her. "You've been over here for fifteen minutes, what the hell have you been doing?" </p><p>"Thinking." <em>And watching you. </em></p><p>"About what?" </p><p>Mac can't tell him the truth, can she? This thing between them has been going back and forth for what feels like forever. It's also rather fucking fragile but there has to come a stopping point at some point, right? What's it going to take? She can't answer that either because everything she's thought of to fix it she's tried without much success. Everything that can be done by a person to show their regret and voice their apologies, has been done. With little to no success. It always feels like it's one step forward and two colossal steps back. </p><p>Mackenzie takes a deep breath and turns to him. The one thing that always remains in the back of her mind in it's little unrestrained corner, the one thought she always forcefully pushes away because it's more than a little reckless, pops to the forefront again as if shouting in a crowd, pick me! pick me! </p><p>Maybe it is time to pick the reckless option. It's the only thing she's hasn't tried and honestly, how worse can things get? She works day after day thirty feet from the life she could have had, a life she still wants, more than anything. <em>Desperately</em>. Maybe now is the time to be brave and bold and to just say fuck it. </p><p>Mac drains the reminder of her drink, the ice clicks against the glass when she places it back against the table with a dull thud. "If I ask you to do something, would you do it?" </p><p>"That... depends." He looks as well as sound spectical and sometimes with Mac it's justified. There's times where you don't really know what she's going to do. </p><p>"If I ask you to stop thinking, to just stop for a moment and to just--" </p><p>"Mac, what are you--" </p><p>A frustrated sounds escapes her throat and Will doesn't get the opportunity to finish because she does what the one outrageous thought always suggests. She closes the gap between them and kisses him. Beneath her lips, under her hands, she immediately feels him tense and for the next few seconds she's filled with panic that she has royally fucked it up but then it actually happens... Will kisses her back. At first it's tentative and awkward, because it's been a few years since they did this last and they've lost their rythmn but slowly they ease into it and get it back. Her hands slide up his chest, feeling him finally relax beneath her as her left hand curls into his shirt while her right slides around to his nape. She wants to fucking cry because it feels exactly as she remembered, it feels like home. It's slow and soft and holds just a hint of underlining desperation but it's everything and more.  </p><p>A whimper escapes in protest when he eventually pulls away but she chases after his mouth, pulling him back in until the need to breath becomes a problem. <em>Fucking lungs... </em></p><p>When her eyes flutter open, Will looks completely stunned as he stares right back. Mac has to wonder if he's shocked because she kissed him or because he actually kissed her back. To be frank, it's a surprise to her that he isn't screaming and running for the hills. It also comes as a surprise when he's the first to break the tense quiet shrouded over them. </p><p>"That-- that changes nothing." </p><p>"Don't be silly." Mac huffs a soft laugh, her left hand releasing it's grip on his shirt to smooth down his chest. "It changes everything. You kissed me back, Billy." </p><p>He pauses as if looking for something to say. "I was being polite." And clearly that wasn't what he wanted to come out of his mouth.</p><p>Mac rolls her eyes. "Do you kiss all the girls that throw themselves at you? Is it a part of your mission to civilise?" She almost takes back her questions,  remembering rather well the revolving door of women he paraded through their newsroom. </p><p>He doesn't dignify her with a reply anyway. Instead just offers a glare, which holds very little heat behind it. </p><p>"You kissed me back, Billy." She repeats unnecessarily like he doesn't know he did exactly that. </p><p>He clenches his jaw and removes his hand from where it still rested upon her thigh. He picks up his glass to take a large sip, using it as a tactic to delay. He rests his elbow against the table so he can prop his head in his hand. "You make it so hard to stay angry with you." </p><p>Mackenzie swallows hard at the clear despair in his words. "Do you want to be angry with me?" </p><p>He runs his hand through his hair, almost in agitation. "It isn't that simple for me Mac."</p><p>"Do you want to be angry with me?" She repeats again, her question barely above a whisper. </p><p>He turns to look at her. "No," he admits quietly, looking both relieved he finally said it and surprised he had.</p><p>It lightens her heart to hear it. It's another step in the right direction. She decides to build on the chance she's taken, embracing her decision to be bold and brave. "I just want another chance Will. I've tried so hard to make things right, to show you... I know it isn't a small thing I'm asking for, I completely understand that but I want it Will, I want it more than I've ever wanted anything." </p><p>"Mackenzie..." His face shows his conflict, the dilemma of forgiving and loving her warring on inside himself. </p><p>"The moment I realised I'd fallen in love with you, it changed everything, it changed my life." She tells him softly, taking the opportunity he's giving her to say what she wants. "We make choices and we have to live with the decisions we make, for good or bad. In my case, very bad and it ruined the one thing that meant most to me. I made a terrible mistake, a stupid mistake that I'll regret for the rest of my life and I lost you, Will. I lost you and in the process I lost myself and it sent me to a war zone where I nearly died." </p><p>Those words hit him like a physical blow and Will exhales a shuddering breath, his eyes locked onto her own. </p><p>"I understand your hurt and I accept your anger, I accept it all because I deserve it but I also know you use it as a weapon to protect yourself. I expect that and worse but it's something you don't have to do." The fingers of her right hand touches his face, fingers gentle against his cheek. "I'm never going to hurt you ever again. I just want a chance to prove that." </p><p>Will for a long time doesn't say anything and it starts to freak her out. She worries what little progress she's made has just been smashed to smithereens. </p><p>"I want to believe that," he admits finally, easing her inner freak out in the process. </p><p>"You can," she reassures quickly then more softly adds, "I love you, Billy." </p><p>The words rock his world. He stares at her and stares at her, then curls his hand in her hair to pull her to him. His mouth finds hers easily, this time though, the kiss doesn't last as long instead he keeps it short and sweet. "I have things to apologise for, I've hurt you too." </p><p>It doesn't escape her notice that he didn't say it back but that's okay. She can wait a little longer. All that matters is they seem to be on the right track. <em>Finally</em>. </p><p>"What do you want Will?" </p><p>A frown crosses his face. "That's such a loaded question," he replies looking thoughtful. "And despite everything that's happened, what I want has never changed. You." </p><p>Relief floods through her and tears prick her eyes. "Then stop fighting me on this because I want you too. I always have." </p><p>Will falls silent and Mac allows him the time he needs to think, his mind clearly working through what it needs to. He drains his glass then turns back to her. "I think we should leave and I think we need to talk. As much I don't want to hear it and it would be easier to bypass it entirely, I never gave you the opportunity to explain and I owe you that." </p><p>She really needs to pinch herself to make sure she hasn't fallen into a deep sleep and this is all some kind of sick nightmare. Because can this really be happening? Is Will honestly willing to sit down and discuss what they should have all those years ago? Like he just said. </p><p>
  <em>What the fuck is happening right now? </em>
</p><p>"Mac?"</p><p>Her scrambled brain catches up enough to answer. "I agree." Her mind continues to scream that she can't believe this is happening but it is. She carries the leather folder and follows behind him back to the bar when he gets up. She stands quietly by his side as he settles not only their tab but also the staffs. She smiles at the gesture because like she told Sloan, he really does have the heart the size of a Range Rover. </p><p>When they finally step outside his driver is already waiting at the curb and she feels bad, wondering how long he's been waiting but he offers them nothing but a genuine smile as they approach. She has to look down in surprise when Will takes her hand in his. </p><p>"My place okay?" </p><p>She smiles softly and nods. </p><p>As she slides into the backseat beside him, she can't help but think there's something to being brave and bold after all.</p><p>Maybe listening to the unrestrained part of your mind isn't madness, sometimes it may offer the most logical option. </p><p>The end. </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for reading</p></blockquote></div></div>
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